Blog-TOWER OF BABEL

I have decide on something very important. I am a person who likes to stand on some ceremony of sorts and I remain true, even in the darkest of times. I do not want to try out or fly for anyone else other than the people I have flown for the past 5 years. I want my old bullshit back, I do not want some new bullshit, unaccustomed bullshit, nouveau riche bullshit,  I like the old agenda, and if i cannot have it, i am not having any of it. I want my owner back. I want him to get another plane, i feel like i have been thru hell and back with he, his family and all of our mutual trials and tribulations.

 

He knew about me having to put my three year old golden retriever down due to kidney failure, he knew when my mom died, he knew when i broke up with pete, he knew when i reconciled pete, he knew when i got skin cancer, he knew when I was having a super day and took me when the bad ones came. He was loyal, smart, irascible, sarcastic, brilliant, compassionate, difficult, moody, and sane. His family never made the crew feel like we were poor in any way, and WORKING FOR COMPANY X Y AND Z, WE WERE POOR ON PAPER. 

We had opinions, we have guts and glory and all those things real people  and cowboys have. And for now, it is gone, baby gone, like a quick birthday candle in the wind. I have tried to interview for jobs, I do not want any of them. I am half hearted, lack luster and it shows. I want a nap.  I would like to fly Desmond Tutu, Mother Teresa of Calcutta and maybe that pilot Sully who landed in the Hudson. That might get me going, but not like I was going. I flew people who called it like they saw it, they remembered their first dollar, their first steak and cheese, ringing the bell on Wall Street and I flew on the first plane they ever owned. It all sparkled like the first christmas lights that you ever saw. 

There was none of this curt crap, no sense of entitlement, no fake attitudes. Money was up there but it was not king. So, no, I will not be taking any new job soon. My heart is not there and I have developed a rash impatience with "this is how we do it here". Right now, I would rather help out at the local church with the downtrodden and live by my own schedule because I have not had one in a while. I do not jump when the phone rings, and I am liking my couch a bit more. My dog knows who I am and my son actually communicates with me at a normal decibel. Maybe I will write that book after all.

So I keep getting theses yellow envelopes for peoples bank,multiple bile colored envelopes , total bounced check and returned check fees totaling 250.00. I asked the bank manager if I was going to be taken off to jail They do have lot of jails in ct. The women's jail is far worse than the mens. more bickering. probably no hormone  replacement, Xanax or tequila  there.

Being broke is sort of like a prison sentence. No freedom, no joy ,no national enquirer bought in the check out line. Now I read it and put it back. The cashier leers and says to herself, she must work for an aviation company. I used to love this aviation company, It was pristine, lovely and I was proud to be a part of its mechanisms. It will be great again too, but I cannot go back there. Too much history, like an old boyfriend, once hurt, I lie in wait for more disappointment.   It is never the same, i lay an broken woman. 

So back to talking about prison, if I did have to go. Would I have a roommate that I called Bitch? Would they pair me up with another flight attendant who wrote bad checks, or would I get a bank robber or a mass murderer? I would like the bank robber because, in this economy, i am going to need a new trade. Murder was thought of this week, but it is a messy occupation. Do they have a resume center there? Can I collect unemployment whilst living with my bitch? Can I get on Ameritrade? Do they have vegetarian fare? Church? Pilates? Coke machine? Quarters? Meditation classes? Only one phone call a day? Any thoughts?

Well, my last blog got some attention, right? Still waiting on the paycheck. It is overnighted. I hope it is not rubber. Had to cash in a Roth IRA, but through all of this..........I still can hug my son and smell his boy hair, and I know everything is and always will be okay.

Was this greed, mismanagement, economy, FAA, government? We will never know. I was taught, "whatever you do, do not hurt anyone" lessons. People have lost their credit rating, their home, their head up at the bank. It all sucks. I am not the same person now. My glory and hope sits on a lower rung now, and I wake up thinking that more bad news is coming my way - no way to live. I hope the check does not bounce this time, but I can guarantee you, it will be my last check earned from company XYZ.

I have a Migraine. I have not had one since i was 9 years old. I deposited my paycheck and vacation pay, total over 10,000.00. I wrote checks, i planned a vacation. i paid my credit cards off in advance. it as my final check from company XYZ. It is my layoff tribute check. Before unemployment kicks in. My mortgage, my car insurance, my hope of respite, my swan song check. bounced. I have no recourse or back up, all will  bounce. I do not borrow, and no one has any money anyway. You do not know where i work, but it is a sign of the times, go do something else. Get trained, flying is dried up! Camelot is over. My son asked me if we were broke, I SAID NO. NOT YET.

I CAN REPORT THEM TO THE LABOR DEPT AFTER 7 DAYS. Done. the pain and agony that they have caused me is insurmountable. But. i should have gotten out when the going was good. last year. The expenses are a joke. One pilot is owed 70.000.00. That is 1/4 of a house. They are not paying him. My question is this? can you afford to work for a company that you have to bankroll?